Humor
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Male/Female Seminars
Sign up now for Summer Classes! All male classes are prepared and presented
by females only and all female classes are prepared and presented by males.
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www.FreeCondoms.com
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Seminars for Males
- Combating Stupidity
- You, too, can do housework
- PMS Learn when to keep your mouth shut.
- How to fill an ice tray.
- We do not want sleazy underthings for Christmas Give us money.
- Understanding the female response to your coming in drunk at 4:00am.
- Wonderful laundry techniques (formerly titled "Don't wash my
silks").
- Parenting No, it doesn't end with conception.
- Get a life learn to cook.
- How not to act like an asshole when you're obviously wrong.
- Spelling Even you can get it right.
- Understanding your financial incompetence.
- You The Weaker Sex.
- Reasons to give flowers.
- How to stay awake after sex.
- Why it is unacceptable to relieve yourself anywhere but the
bathroom.
- Garbage Getting it to the curb.
- You can fall asleep without "it" if you really try.
- The morning dilemma if "It's" awake. Take a shower.
- I'll wear it if I damn well please.
- How to put the toilet lid down (formerly "No, it's not a
bidet").
- "The weekend" and "sports" are not synonyms.
- Give me a break! Why we know your excuses are bullshit.
- How to go shopping with your mate and not get lost.
- The remote control Overcoming your dependency.
- Romanticism - Ideas other than sex.
- Helpful postural hints for couch potatoes.
- Mother-in-laws They are people, too.
- Male bonding Leaving your friends at home.
- You too can be a designated driver.
- Seeing the true you (formerly "No, you don't look like Mel
Gibson, especially when naked!").
- Changing your underwear It really works.
- Techniques for calling home.
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Seminars for Women
- "Are you ready to leave?" Definition of the word
"yes".
- Appropriate rhetorical questions (Formerly "Honey, do I look
fat?").
- Crying and law enforcement.
- You can go shopping for less then 4 hours.
- Gaining five pounds v. the end of the world: a study in contrast.
- The Seven-Outfit Week.
- The Super Bowl: Not a Game A Sacrament.
- Telephone Translations (was: "Me too" equals "I Love
You").
- How to Earn Your Own Money.
- Gift-giving Fundamentals (was: Fabric Bad, Electronics Good).
- Putting the Seat Down By Yourself: Potential Energy is on Your Side.
- Know When to Say When: The Limits of Makeup.
- Beyond "Clean and Dirty": The Nuances of Wearable Laundry.
- We forget birthdays, you forget sports stats: LET'S LET IT DROP.
- MYOB: Proper response to other couple's public arguments.
- Yes, You Can Buy Condoms (was: WE learned to deal with the embarrassment).
- Joys of the Remote Control: Reaping the Benefits of 50+ Channels.
- What Goes Around Comes Around Why His Credit Card is Not a Toy.
- The Penis: His Best Friend Can Be Yours.
- His Poker Games: Deal Yourself Out.
- Committment Schmittment (was: Wedlock Schmedlock).
- "To Honor and Obey:" Remembering the small print above "I
Do".
- Why Your Mother Is Unwelcome In The House.
- Your Mate: Selfish Bastard, or Victimized Sensitive Man-child Healing his
Father Wound by Expressing the Latent Wild Man Within?
If you have a favorite joke, please send
it to me. I'd be happy to post it on my site.
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www.amazom.com
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If you'd like to keep up to date with future updates of
my joke collection, I've created a Yahoo!
group that you can join. It's a newsletter group, so
you shouldn't get any annoying junk e-mail; I'll send all of the
messages to this group.
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